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Remembering Olestra

from Not Now, but RIGHT NOW! by Scissor Now!

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about

I lived in house with 6 other people. It was cheap that way and we were poor, so treats were few and far between...except for the beer. We always had beer. Priorities, right? Anypoop, my bedroom was actually a dining room in the front of the house with the front door and windows all covered with tinfoil, so I could sleep late. I also had easy access to the mailbox, so typically, I'd bring in the mail.
One day, there was a can of Pringle's Chips in a long bag, hung from our mailbox. They were some kind of promotion for their new line of Wow! Chips. "Score!" I thought, "Free chips and nobody else knows about them!" So, I ate nearly all of them before going out into the common area, where my friends asked "Where did you get those?"
"These? They came in the mail. Some kinda promo. They say 'Wow!' on them." I replied.
"Those are those fat-free jobs with Olestra in them." one of my friends informed me, "Ha, you lose weight by getting diarrhea!" she chuckled.
"Taste fine to me." I quipped trying to maintain the idea that I had cleverly duped them out of free chips. Alas, any shred of that was lost as I took up residence on the toilet for an hour and a half while my friends laughed and drank beers in the very next room. I could hear them through the door. I was a jerk and I got my just desserts. Karma.
I didn't write this song, I just lived it, so you don't have to.
-Jef Porkins

lyrics

Remembering Olestra

credits

from Not Now, but RIGHT NOW!, released June 21, 2013
Jess Bratus: Saxophone/ Lead Vocals
Laura Leonard: Bass/ Vocals
Kevin Sanchez: Drums/ Vocals

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Scissor Now! Ann Arbor, Michigan

We're from Ann Arbor, MI. Describing our sound is usually a futile exercise as our perspective from the inside is quite different from yours on the outside. Jazz drums, punk bass, and pop vocals w/ a sax lead. Let us know what you think we sound like, it's always interesting to hear. Sometimes they’re flattering, sometimes it's just a band with a saxophone. One thing we know is, we're not ska. ... more

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